Saturday, October 12, 2013

(This is bitter and self-pitying)

I think it's actually a little easier if I don't expect to sleep at night. It's now one forty seven, and one of the girls has been howling since ten or eleven. This will be the third night in a row with pretty much sleep, and something like eight out of nine days with uninterrupted chunks of up to an hour or possibly two at best. I am starting to dissolve into hysteria and paranoia about whether I am ever going to sleep again.

On the bright side, Cynthia and Stuart came over and made us an amazing Vietnamese dinner plus ginger custard and brought wine. We had a lovely time.

Tomorrow church is not going to happen, but someone HAS to take some of the kids out for some exercise. We have just had our second day of Nat's illness and the kids doing practically nothing but watching videos. It's terrible for them and I need to be awake enough to run them outside somewhere.

It might not be Alzheimer's. It might be a brain tumor.

I wish I could go to sleep.

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