Geoff and I had a conversation last night, basically about holy leisure.I'm continuing in feeling crushed, and my stolen minutes are eaten up in re-reading novels or in Facebook, and I feel guilty- notice the 'stolen'. But blogging, reading, and conversation shouldn't be stolen, and I shouldn't feel guilty. This is my journal, commonplace book, and gathering place with friends. So I am going to try to blog every day this week. Doesn't have to be about anything in particular, although today I'm going to process.
This is Geoff's first full week at home, and there are appointments we need to make and then make it to. I should visit some long term care facilities and meet with the care coordinator, plus call CCAC and explain to them why my PoA is valid. Nat should got to the dentist, preferably this week. The homeschool meetup is this afternoon. One of the Holy Leisure things I want to concentrate on is more actual, intentional homeschooling and fun trips, because I've got backup here, I want to follow up on Nat's interest in Anansi and do more videos or stories about him, do some Native legends, maybe, to counteract the Peter Pan nonsense, and start reading all the fairytales from Into The Woods. We spent the first couple of months of homeschooling doing a lot of history, and I think it's time to back off and head into story, with frequent applications of poetry.
I can do this. I'm still having frequent attacks of grief and anger, and it colours everything, but I'm trying to focus on that this is not through my strength alone. I can see how God is working to care for my parents. I have to relax and not assume that I am the only one working at this. Not something I'm good at, but I need to not burn out. I'm good at being lazy or being controlling, but I'm not good at actually relaxing. Deep breaths and lots of Halloween candy.